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Thursday, August 27, 2009

Last Night

Last night I had a terrifying thought/realization...call it whatever you want...that there is a human being inside of me who in the not too distant future will be outside of me (thank God) and depending on Kyle and me for basically everything.

I had this knee weakening realization while staring at my bare ever expanding belly in the mirror. Talk about horrifying! I mean I always technically understood that there was a human being growing inside of me from the very beginning BUT I never truly thought about it...I mean really thought about it...until last night and it made me a little sick at my stomach...you know the holy crap I'm really unprepared sick at your stomach feeling?

I guess I began to think a little about the fact that Caroline will rely on me to make the best possible decision for her earlier that day while Ellen, my best friend, and I had a conversation/debate via text over whether to get or not get the swine flu vaccine. During the text convo I found myself waiting to hear if she was going to get the vaccine so that I could just follow her lead...this is her second child so I was basically just following whatever the more experienced mother decided. It was at this point that I realized that Caroline would be depending on me to make not just this important decision but other even more important decisions in the future. OH VEY!

Needless to say it freaked me out and I began to crave a glass (or two) of wine. Motherhood is going to be tough! Hopefully I'll hone my decision making skills before she makes her debut. (note the choice to use color since there are no pictures to express my true horror!)

7 comments:

melissa said...

Your going to be a GREAT Mom!!! Caroline will be very proud of her Mom and Dad!

Kate said...

I second Melissa's comment. You are going to be amazing at motherhood. You can adopt me for a quick trial run if you want :)

Kristen said...

Thanks for the votes of confidence girls it is much appreciated.

Kate Robinson said...

So... shot or no shot? I think I will be following you ladies! and I totally second the girls that you are going to make a fabulous mom!

Norm said...

dude, you're waaaayyy more motherly than you give yourself credit!
1. you bake eric that cake he likes everytime you see him
2. you send sweet notes to people when you're thinking about them
3. you plan super fun parties
4. the rest will happen on the fly

Kristen said...

Megan, if only Caroline would be as easy as Eric. I emailed him yesterday and told him that Jeff Lewis (from Flipping Out)reminded me of him...which he totally does

Paul and Leslie said...

I vote for the swine flu vaccine...why the heck not? It's one less chance you'll catch the flu (because there will be a "regular" flu shot too). If you catch the flu and give it to Caroline, she ends up in the hospital getting all kinds of tests and that wouldn't be fun for anyone. That's just my opinion, though.